Until Death Do Us Part
by silverbirch
Summary: The married life of Remus and Nymphadora Lupin. It's canon, so don't expect a happy ending. Rated T for later descriptions of the Battle of Hogwarts and the potential termination of a pregnancy. You are allowed to review it, you know.
1. Chapter 1

I don't own it, JK Rowling and various others do.

--

'I don't care.'

That was all she said to him, no matter what argument he used. He was too old; she didn't care. He was too poor; she didn't care. He was too dangerous; she didn't care. She'd told him a million times; she didn't care. It was like persuading an over-tired four year old it was time for bed.

The others were no help either. Arthur Weasley; solid, dependable Arthur Weasley had just taken her side, saying that he had been 'taking a ridiculous line all along.'

They were stood in the hospital wing; around Bill Weasley's bed where his fiancée was treating the wounds he had received fighting Fenrir Greyback. Dumbledore had been killed less than an hour before. This was not the time to talk about love.

Then, even Professor McGonagall had supported her. McGonagall, who had been old when he was young, was talking about Dumbledore and saying he would he 'happier than anybody that there was a little more love in the world'.

Even when they left the hospital wing, she had not given up, and pulled him in to a darkened alcove to continue their conversation.

'Remus, can't you see? I love you; that's all that's important. I love you, and more than anything in the world I want to be with you.'

'Dora, we've been through all this before. To marry me would mean you risking everything you have; your family, your job, your future.'

'I don't care, can't you see that?' She was looking at him in hopeless desperations and, for a strong minded, sassy, independent woman she suddenly seemed a small, vulnerable child. He felt his heart melting as he looked at her and forced himself to turn away before he crumbled.

'Dora, I will never ask you to marry me.'

'Then you leave me no choice, Remus.' She certainly didn't look small and vulnerable as she went down on one knee, taking his hand.

'Dora? What are you doing? Get up.' There was a hint of panic in his eyes.

'Will you marry me, Rumus?'

'Get up, please. What are you doing?'

'I'm proposing to you, Remus.'

'This isn't…you can't…you're not supposed…'

'Why not? Because I'm a woman? Because it isn't the twenty-ninth of February? I love you, and I want to be with you for the rest of our lives. Will you marry me, Remus Lupin?'

It was the ultimate closed question. There was only one of two words he could say.

If he accepted, he would condemn her to a life on the edge. He would never find work; he could never afford to keep her. She would be shunned, as he was shunned, by the majority of society. Perhaps even her own family would cast her out. If he loved her, truly loved her, how could he be responsible for that?

But, if he refused, what then? She would accept his answer, he knew that. She would go away and try to rebuild her life, and he would never be able to see her again. Could he do that, especially at a time like this? He knew her patronus had changed; changed to him. She had lost her ability to metamorphose; her hair was now a mouse brown rather than the pink he was used to. He had done that to her; he had drained her of her powers at the time she most needed them. He was affecting her ability to survive.

'Yes.'

She threw herself at him, pulling him in to a hug whilst wearing the biggest smile he had ever seen; her hair turned to a vivid, shocking pink. It was fortunate she could not see his face; his expression was only one of resignation.

-o0o-

They returned to her room in Hogsmeade; she had been stationed there with other aurors all year to provide additional security to the school. He had only come up that day following a summons to the Order of the Phoenix from Dumbledore.

The room she had been given was small and cramped; containing only a bed, chair, wardrobe, chest of drawers and bedside cabinet. She went in before him and started scrabbling around picking up clothes that were scattered everywhere. He saw several small lacy items being whipped out of sight, and turned his eyes away. Blushing slightly, she indicated that he should sit in the chair, whilst she sat herself on the edge of the bed.

For a couple who had, on what was effectively their first date, just got engaged; they found talking difficult. She sat looking at the floor, twirling a piece of hair between her fingers. He sat, looking at the ceiling and drumming his fingers lightly on the arms of the chair. He was the first to speak.

'Dora, there's something important I have to tell you.'

'Yes?' She scanned his face intently.

'You missed a pair of knickers; they're by the bedside cabinet.'

As ice-breakers go, it was a pretty good one. She hastily kicked her lingerie out of sight, under the bed.

'I will get better, you know. I'll learn all the household spells and cleaning charms, and…that thing you do with dirty dishes.'

He looked confused for a moment. 'Washing up?'

Yes, that's it…' her face looked doubtful 'isn't it? Or is that clothes?'

'No, that's just "washing", I think.' He smiled at her as she looked abashed, and held out his arms. 'Come here.'

She came to sit on his lap; resting her head on his shoulder.

'Oh, Dora, we're going to have so many problems.'

'I know, Remus. We've got to find somewhere to live, and buy food, and do the…dishes and clothes things. Just like any other couple.'

'But it will be so much harder for us, for you. I'll never have money, never have a job. Up until now the Order has been providing a little…funding, but I don't know what will happen now. I can't keep you.'

She looked at him, her face hard. 'I'm not some little woman, you know. I've got a job, a good one, and I'm going to keep it. I can earn enough for both of us.'

'You mean, I stay at home?'

'Why not? You know the difference between washing and washing up. Why not, Remus? You're the liberal, the intelligent one. This isn't the nineteenth century, you know. In fact, it might be easier when you have your 'she broke off in to a giggle '…time of the month.'

It was his turn to look serious now. 'You know how dangerous I am then, don't you? I'm not just me with fur. You can't be near me, at all; I won't know who you are. I'll attack if I get the chance.'

'I know. I know that. We'll find you somewhere safe, and I'll leave you alone. Remus, none of it is insurmountable; we'll work it out. When do you think we should get married?

'What do you want to do? Shall we wait?'

'No. As soon as possible. We can go and tell my parents; after the funeral.'

He slept in the chair that night, somewhat uncomfortably. She offered to share the bed with him, but he decided not to; not until they were married.

-o0o-

He stayed in her room most of the time. There were Ministry people, including the Minister himself, up at the school and he wanted to stay clear of them. Most werewolves had gone over to Voldemort, so all were tarred with the same brush. She, of course, had to work her allotted shifts.

They walked up to the school together on the day of the funeral, holding hands. This was not so much a statement of their status, but merely a comfort; Dumbledore had been important to both of them. He had been the only one to give Lupin a job; a chance to earn his living and hold his head up. Lupin had enjoyed that year at Hogwarts, and had thought he was a good teacher. Perhaps, one day, when things were better he could try again.

Tonks also had a great deal of respect for her old Headmaster. He was one of the few who had seen past the clumsy, rather shy, exterior to the true potential underneath. She had wondered if he had pulled some strings to get her on to auror training; her NEWT results had been adequate rather than exceptional.

Although they had not meant to draw attention to themselves, they saw Harry Potter look over to them and smile slightly, and Mad-eye Moody had growled 'About time too' as they walked past him.

They sat next to each other during the service, looking out over the lake. Like many current and former pupils, they had found this view a balm during difficult periods in their lives and it eased them now as it had eased so many in the past.

Once it was over, Tonks prepared to go to Hogsmeade station. She would be riding back on the train with the other aurors to keep guard over the children. Lupin would make his own way back to London. They found a quiet out of the way corner in which to make their plans and say goodbye.

'So, I'll see you Sunday? About two o'clock?'

'Dora, what if your parents won't support us? I can't be the cause of a family split. Families are too important.'

She took him in her arms. 'They won't, honestly. They broke the rules themselves. They know how important love is.' She leaned forward, and their lips met. Suddenly, everything else faded in to insignificance. They had each other, they were in love. That was all that was important.

'HA!' They leapt apart and Moody came round the corner, with a huge grin on his face. 'Useful things, magic eyes! You going to marry her, boy?'

'Yes, Alastor, I am.'

'Well, you make damn sure you look after her properly. She's my favourite pupil, and I won't have anybody playing the fool with her. You hear me?'

He gave Tonks an enormous hug. 'I'm pleased for you Tonks, very pleased. I hope you'll be happy.' Then he shook Lupin by the hand. 'Remember what I said boy; I'll be keeping my eye on you.' He strode off, laughing at his own joke.

'After him my parents will be a piece of cake, Remus.'

'Oh, I hope so.' He kissed her once more. 'Go on, back to work. I'll see you Sunday.'

She ran off, turning to wave goodbye as she rounded the corner. Unfortunately, this got her feet tangled up and she tripped over. Jumping up she gave him a grin and a last wave, and then disappeared.

Remus stood there, smiling and shaking his head. 'I've got this for the rest of my life! Oh brother!'


	2. Chapter 2

'Dromeda, what's got in to that girl?'

Ted Tonks didn't like mysteries, and the way his daughter had been acting this morning was definitely…mysterious.

Firstly she had come downstairs at what was, for her, a ridiculously early hour; and wearing a dress. Then she hadn't been able to sit still for more than five seconds at a time. She seemed nervous about something; and that was never good news. It meant you always knew where she was in the house just by following the bangs and crashes as she walked in to things, or tripped over things or dropped things.

By eleven o'clock, she had already been upstairs to change, having decided that the dress she had on 'isn't really my colour'. The second one had lasted less than an hour, before being declared 'too tarty'.

Andromeda smiled at her husband. 'I have a feeling we're going to meet her new boyfriend.'

'Oh, Gawd help us' was Ted's response.

'Now, Ted, don't be like that.'

'Well I hope he's better than the last one; hair half way down his back and a bloody ring through his nose...'

'It wasn't a "ring through his nose", it was a stud. Lots of young men have them these days. It's fashionable.'

Ted rolled his eyes, and made a noise that sounded very like 'Tchah'. 'Well, I hope this one can talk. The moron with the "stud" couldn't string two words together to make a sentence. I've seen more intelligent Flobberworms.'

'Oh Ted, he wouldn't talk because you frightened the life out of him…'

'I didn't!'

'Yes, you did. Asking him if he had "barberphobia" before he'd even sat down wasn't funny; just give this poor lad a chance. She's old enough to know her own mind by now.'

At about half past one, Tonks had headed upstairs to change again, declaring that 'I look like my granny.'

Shortly before two, there was a knock on the door, which Ted answered.

'Remus? What brings you here?'

Tonks came flying down the stairs – literally. She tripped and landed sprawled on the floor between them, jumping up quickly and pretending that nothing had happened.

'Remus! Come on through to the lounge!'

Ted followed slowly behind them; he was trying to put two and two together in a way that gave him an answer he liked. Andromeda went to make tea, and the other three made small talk until she returned. Setting down a tray, she started handing out cups and pouring.

'So, Remus, what a nice surprise! If it's to do with the Order we' she indicated herself and her husband 'can leave you in peace.'

'No, mum, he's come here to ask dad something. Haven't you, Remus?'

Lupin looked like a rabbit caught in car headlights; he couldn't believe what she'd just done to him. She'd proposed to him, now she was expecting him to ask permission to marry. He felt suddenly trapped.

'Have I?…yes...yes, I suppose… The thing is…Mr Tonks that…umm…DoraandIwanttogetmarried.'

'Pardon?'

'I would like to …to marry your daughter.'

The silence was awful. Andromeda sat poker straight in her chair, her hands in her lap, her face expressionless. At this moment, her Black ancestry was very, very obvious. Ted got up and walked around the room, rubbing the back of his neck. Remus and Dora sat holding hands and looking at each other, slightly frightened. They felt like a couple of teenagers, not grown adults.

'Dad?'

He turned to face them. 'At, umm…' Ted was rubbing his hand across his forehead 'at this stage, I'm supposed to ask you what your prospects are …but I don't have to, do I? How do you intend providing for my Dora?'

'We've worked it out, dad; I'm going to carry on working. I'm on a good salary.'

'So he's going to live off you, is that it?'

'No, that isn't it. It's just like you and mum, she's never worked; she runs the house.'

Ted looked up at the ceiling. 'Oh, now I've heard everything. YOUR MUM'S A WOMAN! That's how it works; men get a job, the woman stays at home looking after the house. That's the way it's always been.'

'THEN PERHAPS IT'S ABOUT TIME IT CHANGED!' Tonks was on her feet, facing him. 'Because, lets be honest, men have made a bloody mess of it!'

'DON'T YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT, MY GIRL!'

'WELL WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE YOUR WAY? Why can't I be the breadwinner? I'm no good doing the washing things.'

'Ted! Nymphadora! Sit down, both of you! This isn't the public bar of the Hog's Head. Sit!' Andromeda Tonks could be forceful when she needed to, and they both knew it. 'Thank you! I will not have shouting and language in this house, not in front of a visitor. Right, now we've all calmed down; Remus, where will you live?'

'I've got rooms; it's not much, but it will get us started.'

'And what about…when you change? What then? How do you intend keeping Dora safe?' Ted was obviously going to play the bad cop in this process.

'It has a secure place. I lock myself in.'

'And no prospect of work, I suppose?'

'No. I want to but I'll be straight with you, there's very little chance I ever will.'

'So you'll stay at home and look after the kids?'

'We won't have children.'

'What do you mean, Remus? Why not?' Tonks was looking at him with confusion; he turned to her.

'We can't have children, Dora. Not ever. What I've got isn't like an illness; it's changed my genetic make-up; there's a chance I could pass it on, and I couldn't do that to my child. I'm sorry, I thought you knew. If that makes a difference' he looked away from her 'I'll understand.'

When she didn't answer immediately, he made to stand up.

'No, Remus, don't. I didn't know that, but it doesn't make any difference. It's you I want.' She looked at her parents. 'So mum, dad? What do you say?'

Ted looked at his wife, then at his daughter. 'You're twenty-five; I can't stop you.' Then he got up and walked out of the room.

'Mum? Please? You know what its like. Am I any different to you?'

'You must live your life the way you see best. I made my choice, with my eyes open, now you have to make yours.'

Tonks turned to Lupin with tears in her eyes. 'Will you wait for me outside please, Remus?'

'Dora, I …'

'I won't be long. Just wait out in the garden.'

He stood out in the garden, feeling the warmth of the sun on his face. It had happened, as he knew it would. It would always be this way. Throughout his life he would be rejected and feared; an outcast from society and now his wife would join him. Perhaps he should just apparate out of her life now, go and leave her with her family. But he couldn't, this was his one chance for happiness; he had found a woman who wanted him for who he was, not what he was.

She came out a few minutes later, carrying a suitcase, and tried to give him a brave smile.

'It might as well be as soon as possible now, mightn't it? I'll tell them; they may come round when they've had a chance to think. If not…' she finished with a sad looking shrug.

Taking his hand, they made their way through the gate to start their lives together. It was not the way she had imagined it when she was a little girl, but it made no odds. Not really.

-o0o-

Remus lived in a couple of rooms in a rather rundown area of London. 'It's not much, but its home' he said to her as they entered.

'Wow! It's all so clean! No things lying all over the place.' She looked at him 'I suppose you'd like it to stay that way, wouldn't you?'

He nodded at her. 'Come on, I'll show you around.' It didn't take long. Apart from the kitchen and bathroom, there were only two rooms. One was a living room with a bed settee, the other his lock away. This had strong bars across the window and locks and bolts across the door – locking from the inside. Its sole furnishing was a quilt lying on the floor.

'You can't get out? But what's to stop you unlocking the door?'

'Keys' he said, and laughed. 'Very difficult to use when you have claws rather than fingers. As long as the doors are locked, I'm safe. I just come in here and wait it out; I don't remember much about it afterwards.'

They went back to the living room and he made them some tea. The warm liquid was soothing after the trauma and journey.

'Dora, I'm so sorry; I thought it might happen like that. If they don't come round, you'll be an outcast, just like me.'

'I won't, Remus. I won't be an outcast, because I'll have you. I'll miss them, of course, but they've made a choice just like I have. We'll survive.'

They spent the day discussing plans for the future, and decided that they might as well get married now as soon as possible. She wanted just a small, very simple ceremony; there seemed little point spending money on a dress, or even an engagement ring. They both knew that finances would be tight, so it seemed silly to spend money if they didn't have to.

As evening approached, Remus realised he would have to say something. It was probably better to get it out of the way early.

'Umm…Dora, if you want, I can go in the other room, and let you have the bed. It isn't a problem, honestly.'

'Why? It doesn't make any difference, does it? We're going to be married soon enough. Unless, of course…you don't…you know…until…'

'You're right, it doesn't make any difference.'

Things were rather awkward between them, though. Remus had never had a regular girlfriend; in fact, he'd hardly ever had a relationship. Dora had, but she realised that things had moved on much quicker between them than with boyfriends in the past. She actually went in to the bathroom to change; remembering to pick everything up, rather than leave it lying around like she normally did. Before she went out, she looked at herself in the mirror and took a few deep calming breaths.

'It's the rest of your life, girl. You wanted him, now go to him.'

They lay next to each other, not touching. Remus was rather tense. Tonks propped herself up on her elbow, and started to trace the angle of his jaw with her finger. He seemed to like that, so she started to run her finger up and down his neck. Suddenly he sat up, putting his face in his hands.

'Remus, I'm sorry! What have I done wrong? Please, tell me.'

'You've done nothing wrong. It's me. I'm sorry, it's just that…I've never…you know…before.'

She managed to stop herself laughing. Actually, it wasn't funny at all. It brought home to her what his life had been up to now. He'd never been close to anybody; his life since leaving school, since the death and imprisonment of his friends, must have been one of unremitting loneliness. Gently, she took his hands away so that she could look at him.

'That's Ok, Remus. Just relax; I'll teach you.'


	3. Chapter 3

The wedding was a very simple affair; conducted in the Registrar Wizard's offices. Dora and Remus gathered with just a few close friends about ten minutes before they were due. Another couple were already inside. The Registrar was particularly busy at the moment; just as he had been last time. With the threat of war and Voldemort hanging over them, a lot of people had brought forward their plans.

They stood around, waiting their turn. Molly and Arthur Weasley had come, of course, along with a few of their family. Ron was there with Hermione Granger; they appeared to be a couple now as well. Ginny Weasley had also come along, but Harry Potter was still with his family in Privet Drive and would remain so for a few more days.

Obviously Moody was present. He had agreed to stand in for Ted if her parents didn't show up. Dora had written to them, telling them the time and place, but hadn't had a reply. She was still hoping they would thaw in time. Kingsley Shacklebolt had agreed to be a witness, which was very good of him given his busy schedule.

Shortly before they were due in, the outer door opened and Ted and Andromeda walked in. Dora threw herself at her parents, screaming 'Mum! Dad! Oh, you've come! You've come!'

Her parents hugged and kissed her, and then moved across to Remus, Ted holding out his hand.

'Remus, I'm sorry. I was wrong; I shouldn't have tried to stand in your way. I apologise.'

Remus smiled as he took the proffered hand. 'Ted, I understand, it's not a problem, and I'm very glad to see you both.' He shook hands with Andromeda as well, and Moody stood aside for her father.

Shortly afterwards, the inner doors opened and the previous couple came out. They were only young, probably no more than eighteen with just two witnesses, neither of whom looked like parents.

Remus and Dora congratulated them and said they were next in.

'Did you decide to go quick, like us?' asked the young man. 'Makes sense to us, who knows what's going to happen now. We haven't even told our parents.'

'If anything happens, at least we'll be together' said his new bride who, like Dora, probably didn't know much about washing up and cleaning charms.

The group moved off to whatever wedding breakfast they had planned.

'We were just the same' said Arthur Weasley. 'Why bother waiting when you didn't know what tomorrow would bring? We didn't tell our parents either, just eloped and got married. It would have happened eventually, but we didn't want to wait.'

The party moved in to the inner office and the registrar stood up, smiling at them though looking rather tired. He was a small, round bellied man with a shock of white hair.

'Good afternoon to you. I am Arbuthnot Fortesque, Registrar for this District. And you are…?

'Remus Lupin.'

'That is your full name?'

'Yes.'

'And you..?' he turned to Dora.

'Nymphadora Tonks.' He mother gave a small cough. 'Oh, alright. Nymphadora Cassiopeia Maud Tonks.' She gave Remus a look that clearly said "Don't you dare".

'Do you Remus Lupin, and you Nymphadora Cassiopeia Maud Tonks…' Remus tried to turn a snort in to a cough and failed miserably 'enter freely in to this marriage?'

'I do.' 'I do'

'Do you Remus Lupin take this woman…'

They made their vows and promises to each and exchanged rings and the Registrar said 'Then, by the power vested in me by the Minister for Magic, I pronounce you bonded for life.'

That was it; they signed the register and were married. As politely but quickly as possible Mr and Mrs Lupin were encouraged out of the room, to be greeted by the sight of a small group waiting nervously outside. It was another young couple; Ron thought he might have recognised them from Hogwarts.

They went to the Leaky Cauldron for a quick drink and a bite to eat. It was certainly not the lavish wedding Andromeda had planned for her only child, but she was at least partly to blame. Kingsley handed them his present and toasted their good health, then had to leave. The others went soon afterwards.

Moody put his arms around both of them before he left. Onlookers would think it was a hug. 'What are your honeymoon plans?' he said quietly.

'We don't really have any.'

'Alright. Be at Arthur and Molly's place about lunchtime on the 27th. We're moving' he dropped his voice even lower 'the boy. Change of plans.' He resumed his normal volume. 'Well, the best of luck to you both. I'll see you soon Tonks…Mrs Lupin' and with a laugh, he was gone.

Arthur, Molly Ginny and Hermione came over to give them hugs; Ron contented himself with handshakes, and good wishes were made. Molly seemed to be a little teary as she looked at them. 'You will come and visit us still, won't you?' They assured her they would.

After spending time with her parents and smoothing over the recent falling out, they went back to the flat, arriving in the early evening; it wasn't a good idea to stay out too late these days. The Weasleys had presented them with a bottle of champagne "to make up with when you have your first argument", but they decided to have it with dinner that evening. Dora hovered around Remus in the kitchen, watching what he was doing. Although they had decided he would run the house, she she wanted to learn to do at least some of the cooking. She watched as he chopped and sliced and seasoned the food, occasionally taking over the stirring of a saucepan when he was busy with something else. Of course, that also meant she could see her wedding band glinting on her finger as she held the handle. She smiled as she ran her new name – Mrs Nymphadora Lupin – through her mind. Maybe it was time to let Tonks go.

'Right let's go and eat' said Remus eventually, sliding the food elegantly on to the plates. They sat at the table, eating the food – which was delicious; he was a very good cook, and sipping their drinks, revelling in the bubbles. It was very quiet in the room; just the two of them, and soft candlelight. For some reason, they kept having this overwhelming desire to smile at each other. Then, Remus' smile turned to a grin.

'So… Cassiopeia Maud, I never knew that. Where did they come from?'

'Oh don't, I was so embarrassed. If mum and dad hadn't of been there I'd have tried to get away with it.'

'Maybe we wouldn't have been properly married, though.'

'I don't care. Mum insisted on Cassiopeia, she said it's traditional for female Blacks to have a stellar name. She still thinks of her self as a Black, you know, despite what happened. Maud was my granny; dad's mum. I'm glad they turned up though; I would have hated it if they hadn't.'

'It was good, I was scared I'd cut you off from your family. Honestly, I'm not worth it.'

She smiled at him, and took his hand. 'Yes you are.'

That evening they went to bed early. This time, it was he who propped himself on one elbow.

'You've been a good teacher; it's about time I showed you what I've learnt, Mrs Lupin.'

She didn't argue, in fact within five minutes she wasn't capable of having any rational thoughts at all. He had been a very good pupil.

-o0o-

The following week was the full moon and the evening before they had sat down together to discuss what would happen. They knew the moon would rise at about half past eight, so he would go in to his room just after eight. He would eat beforehand, but then needed nothing else except water, which went in to a bowl.

She stayed outside, of course, and heard him locking down the bolts and taking the keys out, there would be no way he could open the door until he changed back the following morning.

'I'm all done in here; now I just lay down and wait. I normally cast a _muffilato_ spell, so you shouldn't be able to hear anything. That's all there is to it; I'll see you in the morning, my love.'

'Goodnight, Remus. I love you.'

She went back to the living room and sat down to try and read, but her heart ached for his suffering. She knew it wasn't as simple and easy as he'd tried to make it sound for her benefit. She wanted nothing more than to go to him and hug him to try and share his pain, but she knew that was impossible. He was right; he would attack her instantly if he got the chance. It was a gap they would never be able to close.

Just after eight-thirty she heard some scuffling coming from his room and moved over to the door. Nothing much appeared to be going on and as soon as she got close her ears were filled with a buzzing noise from the spell anyway. She returned to the sofa but shortly afterwards went to bed herself. It was strange lying there, in a room that she still thought of as his rather than theirs, without him. One day they would start looking for a house of their own; something that belonged to both of them and they could turn in to a home. Somewhere with a garden, so he could grow things and they could have somewhere to sit during the summer. And somewhere with a dining room so they could have friends round and she would impress them all by doing the cooking. One day.

She smiled a little sadly; it sounded like the sort of house that needed children. That thought had never worried her in the past, mainly because she could never see herself giving up work to be a mother. Now she wouldn't have to, but it could never happen. Sometimes, it didn't help to have your wishes come true. She quickly put aside the idea of adoption; it would never be allowed. Unless…that was it! They could adopt children like Remus. It did happen occasionally, and they were normally impossible to place; nobody would willingly take in a child afflicted like that, but they were in a perfect position to do so. She lay back on the bed with a huge grin on her face. She _could_ be a mother. One day.

She awoke the next morning to the smell of coffee and frying bacon. Remus had already changed back with the setting of the moon and was now hungry. Later, he would be tired but for now all he wanted was food. She got up and went to see him, wrapping her arms around him and giving him a kiss.

'It's good to have you back; I missed you.'

He smiled at her, and returned her greeting. 'Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you, but I'm starving. Fancy a fry-up?'

She shook her head and went to get dressed. By the time she was ready he had come in with cereal for her and a plate piled high for him. It was the full works; sausages, bacon, kidneys, black pudding, fried eggs, fried bread and mushrooms.

'I do get a bit hungry' was all he said before diving in.

That evening, they had to go through it all again, and then it was over for another four weeks. The following evening, she welcomed him back to their bed and by next morning they were both hungry.

-o0o-

The afternoon of the 27th of July saw them assembling at The Burrow. There had been a "discussion" before they had set out. Remus was of the opinion that Dora should stay behind.

'But, its all be arranged. Moody wants us both there.'

'I'm not sure I do, Dora. We don't know what he's got planned, and…well, it could be dangerous.'

Her eyes narrowed. 'Not as dangerous as me when I'm wound up, Remus. So you can drop the protective husband bit, right now. For a starter, I'm an auror, not some weak and feeble little girly. If anyone should be worried, it's me; you're the amateur.'

He glared at her. 'I've been here before, Dora; don't you call me an amateur. I've already fought Voldemort, remember? When you, I might add, were still playing with your dollies.'

'I DID NOT PLAY WITH DOLLIES.'

'OK, maybe you didn't, but you were still little.'

'And now I'm not, I can look after myself. Are we going, or what?' She stormed out of the flat, giving him a very dirty look.

Thirteen of them assembled in the dining room at the Weasley's house, twelve listening to Moody running through the plan. It was impressive and Mundungus Fletcher looked suitably proud.

'Now, we think it will take You-know-who by surprise, and we should at least have some time before reinforcements can get to the scene if, as I believe, they might have a couple of people in the area. We should be able to get through those by sheer weight of numbers alone.

Remember, the main point is to get Potter out of there alive. Everything is secondary to that – and everyone else is expendable. Have I made myself clear?'

His magical eye passed over a very sober group of people in deed. Even the Weasley twins weren't smiling any more.

'Right then, it's time. Let's go. Good luck, everybody.'


	4. Chapter 4

They got back to the flat in the early hours of the morning, just as dawn was breaking, and collapsed on to the bed. Remus was still shaking. That wait at The Burrow for Dora to come back with Ron had been the worst few minutes of his life; it had felt like eternity, and he had been convinced she had been killed.

As it was, it was bad enough. Moody was dead and George Weasley injured. George had been behind Remus, who had felt him slump and nearly fall. They had only just got back to the safety of the protective wards in time. The worst part of it all was that somebody had betrayed them. The plan had gone horribly wrong and they had been attacked as soon as they had left the Potter household. The only good point was that the boy was safe.

Dora was still in shock over Moody's death; it had come as a terrible blow to her. Of all the people who had trained her, he was her favourite. The feeling had been mutual; Moody had seen her as some kind of protégé and had made every effort to ensure she had successfully got through her training. She sat on the bed, crying and shaking; the pretence she had had to maintain on front of the others could be let go.

'We should get some sleep' he said to her. Fatigue was draining him; not only the flight and fight, but the fruitless search he had undertaken for Moody's body with Bill Weasley.

She turned to him, nodding and sniffing back the tears. 'Please just hold me first, Remus.' He took her in his arms, stroking her back and hair, feeling how frightened she still was.

'I never expected that, I don't think any of us did; I thought we were all going to die. That Ron Weasley was pretty good, you know. I'll be honest, I always thought he was a bit of an idiot, but he can do his stuff alright. What was Harry's problem? You said something about him.'

'He's too much like his father; too trusting and just too…_nice_. He gave himself away to the Death Eaters chasing him. He's going to have to toughen up…'

'He's only young, Remus, give him a chance.'

'That's the problem. Eventually, he's only going to have one chance and if he blows it, well… He needs to learn how to kill, or at least put people down. It's brutal, but he'll have to do it eventually and the sooner the better. It's not a game any more.'

Eventually, they fell asleep but a certain light had gone out of the world, and although they obviously didn't know it, they would never live to see it return.

-o0o-

Dora remained quiet and distracted for a couple of days after the rescue mission, which Remus naturally put down to her grieving for Moody. Despite extensive searches, they had been unable to recover the body and it was looking more and more likely that the Death Eaters had done the job for them. Remus would have preferred it not to be the case. A funeral would have at least brought a closure, and he assumed it was the lack of that which was causing the problem.

The 26th of July found Dora still sitting around in the flat; she had not returned to work since Moody's death, having called in sick. Remus thought it was time to pull her out of it. He crossed to the sofa, sitting beside her and putting an arm around her shoulder.

'Dora, Moody knew – probably more than anyone – what we were getting in to. He would have still gone on the mission, even if he had known what would happen; we all would. We have to carry on; it's what he would have wanted.'

She looked at him with dull eyes. 'Hmm? What did you say?'

'I was talking about Moody. I know he was special to you, but we have to carry on, as hard as it will be without him.'

'Yes, I suppose so.'

She returned to her distracted manner, just sitting on the sofa, hardly aware he was next to her. Remus was now confused; he'd assumed that was her problem and she would want to talk about it.

'Dora, what's the matter?'

'It's nothing…nothing you want to get involved in.'

'I'm your husband. If it involves you, it automatically involves me.'

'Not this one. Its better you don't get involved. This is something I have to do myself.'

He turned her face towards him, cupping it with his hands and trying to kiss her. She pulled away from him and stood up walking around the flat and not looking at him. He stood as well and put his hands on her shoulders.

'Dora, tell me, please. I want to be a part of what ever it is. Don't push me aside. Please?'

She looked at him and shook her head. 'No, Remus, not this one. It's better on my own.'

He pushed her back to the sofa, forcing her to sit. 'We share, Dora. We share, tell me.'

She still wouldn't look at him. 'OK, we share.' There was no defiance, no real emotion in her voice; just a fatalistic acceptance. 'I'm late.'

He shrugged his shoulders. 'What do you mean? Late for what?'

She buried her face in her hands. 'Oh Remus. LATE! Late as in late.'

'I'll still don't…where are you supposed…'

'I'M PREGNANT, YOU IDIOT.'

He slumped to the floor, too stunned to speak. What the hell did she think she was playing at?

'How? I thought you were dealing with all that side of it. I told you, I made it perfectly clear that we…'

'I DIDN'T DO IT ON PURPOSE. I swear I didn't; something must have gone wrong. I told you you didn't want to get involved. I'll deal with it.'

'What do you mean "deal with it"? _We're_ going to have a child, this is both of us and, trust me, you might need me around.'

'I won't need you. I'll go to St. Mungo's and, if not, I can probably brew up the potion myself.'

'St. Mungo's? Potion? What are you talking about? They won't be able to cure our child any more than they can cure me.'

She looked at him and shook her head in disbelief. 'I know you're not being deliberately stupid. You honestly don't get it, do you? I'm not talking about a cure; I'm talking about a solution. If there's no child there'll be no problem, will there?'

'No child? But there already is a child, inside you right now. You can't just make it go…oh no. No Dora. You can't do that. I won't let you do that.'

'It's a solution. Like you said, we can't have children. You think I'm going to let it be born then give it up for adoption, knowing it will spend the rest of it's days in some home somewhere because nobody will want it?' The tears ran down her face unheeded. 'I won't do that, not to my child. I'd rather get it over and done with now.' She made for the door 'Don't try to come with me.'

He lunged at her, pulling her back and pinning her arms behind her.

'You're not going. I won't let you kill our child.'

'WE HAVE TO! You said so yourself. Let me go.'

He pulled her back to the sofa, making her sit once again and using his greater strength to hold her there.

'No. We can't do that, not to an innocent child. He never asked to be conceived. We…I…together, we'll care for him.'

'You're being irrational, Remus. You've already told me what might happen. You said there was no way you would allow a child to go through what you've gone through. You can't have it both ways. It's best all round if I end it now.'

'We're not talking about best anymore. We're talking about a human being, our child. I don't want you to do this.'

'I don't want to either.' She threw herself forwards in to his arms, crying freely now. 'I've only known for a couple of days; I thought it was the shock of losing Moody first, that can sometimes make it happen, but it wasn't. I've already started thinking about him, or her, as a person. I don't want to kill my baby.'

Their tears mingled as they clung to each other. 'You won't, Dora, you won't. We'll work it out; between us.'

They spent a long time like that, just holding each other as the full enormity of what they had discussed swept over them. Dora swung between pity for her unborn child and self-loathing at what she had considered doing. Remus blamed himself for getting her in to this situation through his lust, for agreeing to marry her in the first place and for not taking responsibility for making sure it didn't happen. Everything was his fault.

When they had eventually calmed down, they began to discus the situation in a more rational manner.

'What are the chances? Will it definitely happen, Remus?'

'No, it isn't definite. The chances are higher because I was bitten when I was young, but there's no way of knowing until after the birth. We'll know at the first full moon.'

'What happens then?'

'I don't know. Whilst he's very young, perhaps you'll be able to be with him, but not later. We'll have to go in together, but I won't be able to take care of him.'

'What about wolfsbane? Won't that help?'

'No, it doesn't stop the transformation taking place; it just keeps your mind human. I tend not to use it, not only because of the expense, but mainly because it's worse seeing what's happening. I'd rather not know, to be honest.'

In the end, they decided that there was nothing they could do until after the baby was born. They would have to love it, and take it from there. Dora found her maternal instincts kicking in much faster than his paternal ones. She, now the crisis was averted, immediately became very protective of her baby, and started to focus in on what was happening to her. Suddenly, her whole outlook on life had changed, and being a mother became the most important thing in the world.

He found it another burden to add to the many he was carrying, and simply added it to the pile. Her, her family, the marriage – now a baby. Which ever he looked at it, all he had done was to make her life more and more difficult.

-o0o-

The following day found them travelling once more to The Burrow, this time for Harry's seventeenth birthday party. They had agreed not to say anything about her pregnancy for the time being, probably not even the Weasleys could pretend to be happy about another potential werewolf, but that didn't stop Dora getting very excited about being with other people again. They had remained in the flat since Moody's death and she was, without doubt, a party animal. It was one more thing he would have to look out for, another straw on the camel's back. He would have far rather stayed at home, and it probably showed on his face.

As it was, they didn't stay that long. Just as they were about to sit down to eat, Arthur Weasley's patronus had arrived to announce that the Minister for Magic was about to arrive, for reasons unexplained. Scrimgeour had never been particularly keen on werewolves anyway, and was now even less so. Lupin being a known member of the Order of the Phoenix would not be a help to him; Scrimgeour hadn't liked Dumbledore either. Lupin was obviously not on the Ministry's side and it would make things awkward for Arthur and Molly if he were seen. As soon as he heard what was happening, Rumus grabbed Dora's hand and they made a run for it.

Once back at the flat, having left the party at a rush and apparated home, they discussed whether or not to return the next day. They had, of course, been invited to Bill Weasley's wedding. Remus was of the opinion that they shouldn't. Dora countered that Bill was an old friend, and they owed it to him. Besides, it would be a chance to have a drink (though nothing alcoholic for her, of course) and a bit of fun. In hindsight, that was one way of looking at it.

She spent a long time getting ready the next morning and tried on virtually all her clothes before settling on a pale blue set of robes. Then she decided that bright pink didn't really go with them so spent an interesting few minutes trying out different coloured hair before settling on a rather bottle blonde. Rumus decided that he would ask her later if she would stay that colour for a while.

Arriving outside the wards to The Burrow, they joined the people queuing to get in and chatting and waving to acquaintances whilst enjoying the sun. They were greeted by Arthur who showed them where the marquee was, and whispered that Harry was now Barney, the one with curly hair showing people to their seats. They were glad to see him, and apologised for having to leave in such a rush the previous evening. He smiled and said he understood perfectly. Mind you, thought Remus, he would say that; as James's son he would always find it easier to forgive. Once more, Remus found himself thinking how ill suited Harry was for what lay ahead. He began to worry about how they could best toughen him up, even as they were shown to their seats.

They sat in the marquee, marvelling at how wonderful Fleur looked. Even Dora couldn't be jealous when she saw Remus taking an extra long look; Fleur had an almost supernatural beauty. It was a marvellous occasion, and she began to have a small daydream that perhaps one day they would marry again, or at least reconfirm their vows, at a similar event.

The reception afterwards was enormous fun; they danced, they chatted, they laughed. Even Remus seemed to lighten up a little. They were just discussing what time to leave - Remus didn't want Dora to get over-tired - when Kingsley Shacklebolt's patronus leapt in to the hall.

'_The Ministry has fallen. Scrimgeour is dead. They are coming.'_


	5. Chapter 5

All around them people were screaming and panicking. Remus grabbed hold of Dora's arm.

'Get out of here, go home now!'

'No way, amateur!' She actually managed to give him a grin. 'Stop staring. Move!'

They rushed to the dance floor, throwing out shield charms whilst the wedding guests began apparating away from The Burrow. Flashes of light flew around the marquee; two distinct sides beginning to form as the room emptied.

Soon the Weasleys, the Delacourts, Dora, Lupin and a few others were stood in a circle, facing outwards. Surprisingly, Viktor Krum was with them.

'We are Ministry aurors' came a magically amplified voice. 'Put down your wands and nobody will get hurt.' The man who had said this moved out from the shadows, and Dora saw it was indeed one of her fellow aurors; Dawlish.

Dora stared at him, a look of contempt on her face. 'I didn't think you'd go over.'

'I'm just doing my job, Tonks.'

'It's Mrs Lupin to you.' She said this with as much bile as she could muster, and he looked taken aback by her response.

'It's not my job to judge, I let the Wizengamot do that.' He turned to Arthur Weasley. 'Arthur…'

'It's Mr Weasley, to you.'

'Mr Weasley, I have a warrant here to search your property.' He handed over the parchment, which Arthur saw was actually a warrant, signed by Dolores Umbridge. 'As you can see, we are looking for possible criminals who may be in hiding. The search is, of course, for you own protection.'

'And what if I decide we can look after ourselves?'

Dawlish looked around at the group with him and dropped his voice.

'Arthur, don't be a fool; make it easy on yourself. If the boy is here, tell me now.' Arthur just stared at him. Dawlish looked at the others in the group. 'Who are you? I recognise you.'

'Viktor Krum.'

'What is your purpose here?'

'I am sorry, my English is not good. Perhaps I vill ask for a representative of my Ministry to be here. To make sure, of course, zere is no misunderstanding.'

M. Delacourt spoke as well. 'Ah, zat is a good idea! Perhaps I shall ask for an official from ze French _Ministere de Magie _to be in attendance also.'

Dawlish looked slightly rattled. He knew he could not refuse, if they pressed; but getting foreign nationals and officials involved did not seem to be a good idea. He was a mandarin to the core, and didn't like anything which sounded as if it would generate more paperwork.

'We will search the property, for you own safety, of course. We will try not to inconvenience you for too long.'

He sent two of his men, one a Death Eater, to the house. It was quite obvious which one was in charge. Fred Weasley went with them, pointing out that this was allowed within the warrant they had served. The house was given a good going over, apart from Ron's room. Fred insisted they searched it, but the ghoul disguised as Ron with spattergroit seemed to discourage them. That also meant, of course, they didn't find the few items Harry had left behind.

Back in the tent, the rest of the group were questioned for hours. The same questions were asked over and over again: where was Potter? When had they last seen him? When had he last been here? Where was the mudblood girl?

They all gave consistent answers; he was not here, he had not been here, they had not seen him or her. Some of the Death Eaters were starting to look bored, and had made free at the bar; this was not their idea of getting a job done. Their mood was turning belligerent under the influence of drink and they were suggesting that there were quicker ways of getting information than asking questions.

'The little girl; lets see if a bit of persuasion on her will get some better answers out of them. They're all blood traitors anyway, it won't matter.'

Dawlish looked around. Despite the changes to the regime, which he was fully aware of, he still thought of himself as one of the old school; an honest Ministry Official who just got on with the job. He had never had much imagination. He knew he was in way over his head; but these were people he knew, he had worked with. He would not see them tortured. Dawlish had contributed to the collection when Ginny was born; he seemed to remember they had got her a cuddly toy.

'There's nothing here. We've done our job. Let's go.' He looked back at Arthur, who turned his head away.

As they left, one of the Death Eaters approached Remus and Dora.

'Do yourself a favour furball, pick the right side. Maybe it would help you decide if we turned her.' He flicked his head towards Dora. 'I'm sure Greyback wouldn't mind assisting. He likes the pretty ones.'

Dora put a restraining hand on his arm to hold Remus back.

Once they were gone, Arthur tried to pull his family together. Molly was the most upset of all, obviously. Dawlish had been known to them for years and she couldn't believe he would go over to You-know-who.

'It's not that simple, Molly' Arthur tried to tell her. 'Dawlish is a good man, but everything is up in the air at the moment. We've all got choices to make.'

-o0o-

Probably thanks to Krum and M Delacourt they had got off lightly. As news came in over the next couple of days, they all realised just how lucky they had been. Four Death eaters had smashed their way in to Dora's parent's house, and had no compunction at all about using the cruciatus curse on both her mother and father to try and get what they wanted. Of course, they knew that Harry Potter had been there when being chased by Voldemort, but got no information out of them. Before they left, they made it perfectly clear that Andromeda would get no protection from her maiden name, and that Ted Tonks was a marked man because he was a mudblood.

The reign of terror had begun.

They stayed in the flat, considering it safe enough; only a select few knew where he lived. Dora had quickly decided she would not return to work, which was sensible; it was more than likely she would have "disappeared" in the first purges. She would not have been alone. Kingsley was one who knew here they were, and called in very briefly one evening.

'It looks bad; I don't think it's safe for any of us any more. I got a tip-off they were after me and got out as quickly as I could. I'm off on the run now; no I won't tell you where. I just hope that, one day, Potter can get his chance. Until then… Good luck to you both, I hope it goes well with the baby.'

Remus came through his next change, which had been worse than usual due to the stress. Dora had lain there listening to him padding around his room, and had been woken one night by him throwing himself at the door. As much as she loved her husband, she was very conscious of the life growing inside her and had remained awake for the rest of the night with her wand at the ready.

Once the full moon was over, he continued to pace around the flat. Kingsley's words regarding Harry kept coming back to him. Remus had no great confidence that the boy was good enough to do the job; and the other two would be no great help. He became convinced that they needed him in order to make it through.

'But I need you too, Remus. We both need you.'

'Others need me more. Dumbledore said that Harry is our best hope, but I don't think he's up to the job. He needs help.'

'I need help, Remus. I'm carrying your child. Are you honestly thinking of just walking out on me? Leaving me?'

'You can go to your mother; she'll look after you. I'm no good to you, I never have been. Remember what they said at the wedding? About turning you? They'll do it. You're better off without me.'

'I'M better off? Or you? Is this what it's all about, Remus? You're fed up with me already, looking for an excuse to clear off?'

'No, of course not.'

'Is that it? Is there somebody else? That's it, isn't it! You've knocked me up, so now it's time to move on!'

'Dora, you're being totally irrational about… It's Harry I want to help; I owe it to James to look after his son.'

'I'M BEING IRRATIONAL? ME? What about your child; doesn't he count for anything? Who's going to look after HIM? So, who is it then? Got your eye on anyone in particular in Harry's little gang? Granger young enough for you, is she? Un-pregnant enough? You know what to do now so you want to get out there and give her the benefit of your experience?'

'WHAT? Dora, stop it now.' He grabbed hold of her arms and shook her. 'Listen to yourself. Can you hear it? You never used to be like this; this is what I've done to you. Don't you see, this is all my fault. You used to be strong and independent. You asked me, remember. Ever since we got married you've been relying on me more and more; I've weakened you.' He released her and started to storm around the room.

'Everything I've done has been wrong, Dora; marrying you, getting you pregnant. It's all been wrong, can't you see that? I'm not fit to be a father. The child will be better off without me. If he isn't like me he'll grow to hate me just like everyone else does.'

Suddenly, all the fight went out of her, and she slumped on to a chair. 'How can you think that? How can you think your child will hate you?'

'I know it, Dora. My whole life will always be like that.'

'Then go. Get out of our lives and go.'

'What will you do?'

Yeah, Remus, like you care. Get out of our lives.'

'I'm sorry, Dora, truly sorry.'

'Get out.'

-o0o-

Remus left the house without looking back. He felt bad about leaving Dora, of course he did. She had loved him, he knew that, a love he had never experienced in his live before but it had all been built on sand. It was his fault; he would have her blamed for nothing. He should have resisted her, refused to marry, let her carry the pain of rejection for a while then get on with her life.

He walked away from the flat, deep in thought. It was only when he saw the two men approaching he realised he had let down his guard; they were Death Eaters. He had to lead them away; Dora was still inside. Instead of apparating he ran, leading them down alleys and through grimy dingy courtyards. His life as a werewolf had given him not only wiry strong muscles, but an almost animal cunning. He was able to negotiate the rat run of passageways around the flat and use walls and fences to his advantage, but always making sure they would keep up with him and follow. Once they were far enough away, he outstripped his chasers for long enough to send Dora a patronus.

'_Being followed by Death Eaters. Flat no longer safe. Get to your parents.'_

He apparated away from London, just to give himself time to think. He headed for wild and desolate countryside, but which ever way he turned Voldemort's men always seemed to catch up with him. In the wilds of the Welsh mountains he only just escaped with his life, having to apparate as he jumped from a cliff. In Scotland, not far from Hogwarts, he was involved in a desperate chase through a dark and gloomy forest. Once more, it was his werewolf side that helped him; he had much better eyesight and a keener sense of smell than them.

Sitting at the back of a small, dark cave he tried to discover what it was that lead them to him with such apparent ease.

'I can't see how they could put a trace on me. There's no way the Ministry are able to track people that way, unless Voldemort has got some kind of power we haven't realised as…'

His ears picked up the sound of feet slipping on stones outside the entrance long before anybody else would have been able to. By the time the Death Eaters entered, he was far away. One of the problems of living on your own for too long is that it is very easy to slip in to the habit of thinking out loud…

He approached Grimmauld Place with extreme caution, slipping between shadows and hardly daring to breathe. He saw the two men in the shadows and knew instantly who they were. To get in to the house, he would have to be point perfect in his landing. Judging the distance, he closed his eyes and concentrated with all his might on the top step, then turned.

-o0o-

Tonks sat in the room, staring at the door. Her mind was incapable of thought; she was not even able to cry. All she could hear, running through her mind in a loop, were his words.

'…without me… I've weakened you…been wrong marrying you…hate me just like everyone else does.'

'…without me… I've weakened you…been wrong marrying you…hate me just like everyone else does.'

'…without me… I've weakened you…been wrong marrying you…hate me just like everyone else does.'

'…without me… I've weakened you…been wrong marrying you…hate me just like everyone else does.'

'…without me… I've weakened you…been wrong marrying you…hate me just like everyone else does.'

She had lost everything; the man she loved, her future, any hope for her child. Her mind turned once more to the potion she knew she was capable of brewing; the potion that would mean her child would never grow up without a father. Perhaps she should even end it for both of them; that way she would never have to live with the guilt she knew would come.

She was shaken from her thoughts as the silver Alsatian dog leapt in to the room and she heard his voice

'_Being followed by Death Eaters. Flat no longer safe. Get to your parents.'_

Immediately she crossed the room to his den. There were no lights on in there and she could look out without being seen. Her training was starting to over-ride her desperation and she was thinking again. She could see nothing, but there were too many deep shadows where street lamps had not been replaced to be certain the coast was clear. Going back to the main room she hastily packed a few clothes and prepared to depart.

She stopped and looked around. This had been their home. This was the room she had come to as a bride. This was the room in which her child had been conceived. This was the room in which her dream had died. Whatever happened, she knew she would never return to it. She turned and apparated away.

Her father's voice had sounded frightened behind the door.

'Dad, it's me – Dora. When I was little you used to pretend to steal my nose. You always hid it in your back right hand pocket.'

The door opened enough for her father to see her, his wand very obvious.

'Dad, it is me. Can I come in?'

He opened the door.

'Where's Remus?'

He had just enough time to catch her as she fell forward in to him, crying.


	6. Chapter 6

'Dora! What is it?' Andromeda had rushed out to the hallway when she heard Ted call out, and helped carry her daughter to the sitting room. They sat her down on the chair and Andromeda sent Ted off to get a glass of brandy.

'No, no alcohol.' was all Dora could say.

They sat either side of her offering warmth and support; that was all they could do until she came round. It was obviously bad, as though her soul had been ripped from her body. This was not the Dora they had known for twenty-five years; for a moment they had the horrific thought that she had been attacked by Dementors.

She had always been a somewhat frustrating daughter; full of love and life, but frustrating none the less. Nothing had ever been taken seriously, be it keeping her room tidy or studying for exams. It had been particularly hard on her mother, for whom appearances and status were everything; she had gone through mountains of parchment during Dora's school years cajoling and arguing. Dora had always been what Ted called a "livewire".

Although Andromeda and Ted had not approved of the marriage, they had eventually accepted it. Dora was old enough to know her own mind and Remus – for all his…problems – offered stability. They had hoped some of his quiet intelligence would rub off on her. Now…

'Dora' Andromeda's voice was unusually soft, 'what has happened? Please tell us; we love you and want to help you.'

'He's gone; Remus has left us' Dora said simply. 'He thinks Harry Potter is up to something; some quest or other, and he's gone to help him. He decided that was more important, so he walked out on us.'

'Us?' her father asked. 'Who's us?'

That wasn't the way she was going to tell them, but she still wasn't thinking straight.

'I'm sorry, I truly am. I was going to tell you. I'm pregnant. I'm carrying his child.'

Andromeda's hand went to her throat. 'Oh, sweet Merlin! How could you let it happen? Didn't you think?'

'THINK, MOTHER? What in hell's name do you imagine I've been doing ever since I found out? All I've done is think. I thought about killing it, I thought about killing myself. Yes, I've thought about it.' She gave way to her gut wrenching sorrow, reverting to being a little girl and wanting mummy and daddy to kiss it better.

Ted put his arms around her and pulled her in to a hug. 'Now, pet, you can't be having thoughts like that.' He looked over at his wife wishing, not for the first time, that she would occasionally think - before opening her mouth. Theirs had obviously been an unusual relationship and he was normally somewhat in awe of her, but not always.

She was a Black, in wizarding terms a potential Duchess, if not a Princess. She came from one of the oldest and greatest families there was. She was related, in some degree, to everybody who counted for anything in their world. He, in contrast, was less than a nobody, muggle born and from poor parents. He was a Hufflepuff, she a Slytherin and yet from this a friendship developed and grew in to a relationship. As is often the case in these things, it was her family that had driven them together. Had they let her have her head for a few months, she probably would have tired of him and come back to the fold. Instead, their stubbornness had collided head on with her rebellious streak and by the time the dust had settled she was married and disowned. She now had no option but to stay with him.

The marriage had developed in to an understanding, rather than a relationship, after the first few years. He earned the money, she ran the house and it was made very obvious that, once over the threshold, she was in charge. He had deferred to this, falling back on his muggle, working class, culture which accepted that this was how things were anyway. Whilst they were no longer in love they were still fond of each other, in their own way, and very rarely argued. It was normally a case of live and let live. Until, that is, it came to his daughter.

Whilst he often played the grumpy old dad; objecting to her boyfriends, her hair, her clothes, her music and anything else that suggested she was young, he loved her with a passion. She was the best thing that had ever happened in his life, and living proof that his marriage had not only been built on sand. He was proud of his daughter; proud of her being an auror and proud that she belonged in this world which had never made him unequivocally welcome. His reaction to her wedding announcement just a few brief weeks ago had been caused as much by the thought of losing his little girl as it had to whom she planned to marry. It had been he who persuaded Andromeda that they owed it to her to attend the wedding and accept her choice, whether they liked it or not.

'Things will work out, you'll see. Don't cry now.'

They got her upstairs to bed in her old room; in her old, comfortable bed she had slept in for over twenty years. It welcomed her back like a faithful friend, wrapping her in a familiar embrace. Ted sat next to her, stroking her hair as he had done when she was little and not feeling well, and told her again that things would work out.

When he left her, she turned her head and cried in to her pillow. That was something she had done in this bed many times before, as well. Every failed relationship had been mourned in this bed, from that boy in her third year whose name she couldn't even remember to Charlie Weasley (she had never fancied Bill, despite what other people had thought), and now she cried for Remus, herself and her baby.

Downstairs, her parents sat disbelief and shock.

'Of course, I knew it was never going to last' said Andromeda. 'But even I didn't think it would be over this quickly. And pregnant too. Oh Ted, what are we going to do? What happens if the baby…we can't keep it here. She'll have to…'

Now Dromeda, keep a grip on things. That's in the future, and we've got enough to be worrying about to be going on with. That's a bridge we'll have to cross when we come to it. I don't like the thought of turning out my own flesh and blood.'

'But it won't be our flesh and blood, Ted. It may not even be one of us. What if it is a …' she couldn't bring herself to even say the word, cultural hatred and prejudice ran too deeply in her veins '…one of them?'

Ted was unable to give her an answer; this was something way outside his range of experience. He'd only ever met one werewolf, who was hardly now in a position to be of any help to them.

Dora stayed in her room the whole of the next day not coming out even for meals. That evening, Ted took her up some soup.

'I'm not hungry, dad. I don't want anything.'

'You have to eat, love. It isn't just you you have to think about anymore, is it?'

Her face crumpled as she tried to hold back the tears. Ted set the tray down and took her in his arms again, holding her close.

'I've really screwed up this time, haven't I dad?'

He gave a grim smile. 'Best not let your mum hear you using that language in the house, Dora.' She almost managed to hiccough a laugh. 'It's not the ideal position to be in, but we'll just have to make the best of it, won't we. Come on, eat something.'

He sat watching her as she spooned the soup in to her mouth. Despite everything, her body was still functioning and she found she was hungry. Once Ted had taken the empty bowl away, she still cried herself back to sleep though. At least in her sleep, the black thoughts left her; she had never been one for dreams. Not really.

-o0o-

Remus left Grimmauld Place with just enough sense left to remember to apparate away before he breeched the Fidelius Charm. He returned to the flat expecting it to be ransacked, but it was deathly quiet. Either the Death eaters had not been inside, or they had assumed there would be nothing worth searching for. He was grimly satisfied to see that Dora had taken clothing with her, which suggested she had left when she received his message.

He threw himself on to the sofa, trying to force himself to think. His mind was in a turmoil; the anger he still felt at Harry's words being tinged with a realisation that the boy – and he was still a boy – had spoken some harsh truths. Even Hermione had used almost the same words as Dora had "how could any child be ashamed of you?" Then Harry had called him a…a…Was he right? Remus bit so hard in to his hand he drew blood.

Was it fear that had caused him to leave Dora? Fear of rejection, not by her, but by his child? Or fear that he would see his child turning in to him, leading the shadow life he had been forced to live? Cowards run from fear, the brave towards it. He could not be a coward.

He had to go back.

-o0o-

Dora had been roused from her room by her mother, who had decided that two days was more than enough time to wallow in self pity. There was still a house to be run, and food to be found. Of course, with neither Ted nor Dora going to work, money would start to get tight and Andromeda was careful with what she had in the house. Even getting food was no longer a simple matter; for all they knew the house was still being watched. Dora could be sent out shopping with some of the muggle money Ted always kept handy for his trips to his own world, and as she could change her appearance it made it better for her to apparate to a muggle area.

Whilst not helping her mother, a task she had always detested, she slouched around, trying to keep out of everybody's way. She was very conscious that she was hardly the returned prodigal, but the daughter who had made a bad marriage and had crept home after less than two months when it had all gone wrong.

Only her father seemed to have any kind words for her, and would often make the excuse he needed some help in the garden just to get her out of the house. He tried to be as non-judgemental as possible; she did not need salt rubbing in to her wounds.

'Oh, dad, I'm so sorry, I really am. You knew all along it wouldn't work, didn't you?' she asked one day as they were picking beans in the vegetable patch.

'I think it was the shock as much as anything, I suppose' he answered carefully. 'Anyway, who says it didn't work? He might come to his senses.' He eyed her curiously. 'Would you take him back?'

'She shrugged her shoulders and grimaced. 'I …oh, I don't know. He hurt me so badly, it was the way he did it, like he didn't care about us, and then what he said…'

'What did he say?'

'He said that…the baby would hate him, because of what he was.'

Ted let out a sigh. 'These are awkward times, Dora. People are having strange thoughts, everything's up in the air.'

Just then a patronus flew over the fence. She recognised it instantly, and she blanched.

'_Please, can we talk? I'm down the lane.'_

'Don't suppose I have to guess who that was from, do I girl? Going to meet him? Want me to come with you?'

'It's alright, dad. This is one I need to do on my own.'

-o0o-

Remus had thought long and hard about the best way to contact her. He decided in the end that it would have to be face-to-face, but best away from her parents; he assumed he would not get a friendly welcome if he just walked up to the house. Once he sent his patronus, he decided he would give it one hour. She turned up after ten minutes.

He was shocked at her appearance. Her hair had once again lost its colour, and reverted to the dull mouse brown it had been when she had proposed. Her face was pale and there were dark rings under her eyes. She approached him slowly, almost warily, looking down and chewing on her thumb nail; he had never seen her do that before. She was not putting on an act for him; he had truly crushed her spirit and she was scared of what he might have to say to her. He was completely devastated by the effect he had had on her. Remus had never been in love before, and so was completely unaware of just how powerful an emotion it could be. All he wanted to do was take her in his arms and make the pain go away for her, but had the intelligence to realise that was not the way to proceed; this would need time and patience.

'Dora, thank you for coming. I was scared you wouldn't.' She shrugged, still not daring to look at him. 'I want to apologise; for the things I said and did to you. I'm not asking for your forgiveness or your understanding, even. I just want you to know how truly sorry I am.'

She put her arms around herself, seeking comfort from them. He had not come here to ask for her back, to try and make a fresh start. He had come simply to apologise and then go. She could not trust herself to speak. He took her silence as damnation, a sign that she didn't want him here, but had come only as a courtesy. As is so often the case, two people nearly lost everything through a simple misunderstanding. Remus bowed his head and turned to go; it was over.

'Remus? Don't go, please. I know…I know you don't love me anymore, and… we're finished, but I don't want it to end like this. I loved you, I truly loved you, I want you to know that, and I will always love you because you gave me a child.'

He stopped and listened to her words. She still loved him? He turned back towards her.

'You don't hate me?'

'No.'

'Dora, I didn't…I never…that wasn't why I left. It wasn't you, it was me. I thought you would have a better life without me.'

She looked up at him. 'You arsehole. How in Merlin's name could I ever have a better life on my own than with you? Come on, Professor, answer that one.'

He ran his hands through his hair, and bowed his head. 'I don't know. Everything was just building up, and I can't see how we can win, and then the baby, and Harry out on his own and…I don't know. I'm scared.'

'Bloody amateur.'

He looked up to see an attempt at a smile playing on her lips as she shook her head. 'Remus, you need looking after. Too much book learning, that's your problem.'

He pressed his fingers to his eyes as the tears came. 'I'm so sorry.'

She came up to him and took his hands away so she could look in to his eyes.

'We can work this, Remus. It won't be easy, and don't think for one moment I've forgiven you, but we can work it out. If we want to.'

They sat on the grassy bank at the side of the lane and discussed where they went from here. Dora was adamant she would not return to the flat with him, not yet anyway. Both agreed that their relationship had been injured by his action, and the wounds would take time to heal. They also both agreed that it was a relationship they wanted to save, if at all possible. It was a start.

They agreed he would come back tomorrow and they would talk further; they didn't kiss each other goodbye.

Remus returned to his flat, pleased that she had not rejected him out of hand. He was willing to give her all the time she needed to make her mind up, and desperately hoped that it would come to a successful conclusion.

Dora returned to the house to be met by her parents. They said nothing, just looked.

'We talked. He's coming back here tomorrow. Would you mind if I invited him in?'

Ted nodded his head slowly. 'You invite him in, love. We'll leave you in peace. If you want to fight for your marriage, that's fine by us. Isn't it Dromeda?'

Andromeda had that look she usually reserved for sour milk on her face. 'If you think it's worth fighting for.'


	7. Chapter 7

Remus came back the next day, and the day after, then every other day. Ted and Andromeda were as good as their word and gave the pair of them space to work out their problems. On a couple of occasions Remus and Dora even went out for the day, normally to muggle areas where Voldemort's baleful influence was not so noticeable. They would go to a pub for a drink, or maybe to the pictures. In many ways it was the courtship they had never had before their marriage, and from it their feelings for each other began to grow again.

Remus was unbelievably pleased the first time Dora held his hand, and a few days later there was even a tentative kiss goodnight. Dora never went back to the flat with him though. They were a rather strange sight going on a date; especially as her pregnancy was starting to show.

Of course, he didn't visit during his moon times and Dora found herself counting down the hours until it was all over for another month.

Yes, things were progressing nicely, and her parents were satisfied that their daughter was showing all the signs of returning to her married state. Then, of course, it all went horribly wrong.

Remus went to the house after his October change, expecting Dora to rush out and greet him. Instead, he found her and Andromeda in the living room, sat upon the sofa. Dora had her arm around her mother, who was weeping in to a handkerchief.

'What's happened?'

'It's dad. He's gone on the run.'

Dora explained that a friend had heard Death Eaters were in the area, looking for muggle borns who had not registered with the Ministry, something Ted had refused to do on principle. He knew he would be arrested, so had decided to take his chances. He had thrown a few things in to a rucksack, kissed his wife and daughter and gone. They had given him all the muggle money left in the house. Andromeda hoped he would try to make it out of the country; his marriage made him more of a target not less.

'They know he's gone? Were you two OK?'

'They were only minions' said Andromeda. 'My sister's names are still enough to keep their sort at bay. But I don't know what we'll do now.'

'Remus will stay with us' said Dora. 'Won't you?'

Remus moved in to the house that day, sharing a room with Dora once again. It was he who took the lead this time, saying that he wanted her back, and wanted his child to grow up in a proper family. It was something she would have said eventually, but was glad he did so first; she had been missing him desperately.

The autumn moved on, a horrible damp cold time. It felt as if Voldemort even had control of the weather, and was using it as another weapon to grind down his opponents. Mostly they stayed in the house, conserving what little food and money they had, trying to make sure that Dora and the baby never went short. Both Remus and her mother lost a little weight as time went on. Remus began using some of his more lupine traits to go out hunting, often returning home with a rabbit or duck for the table. One night he got a goose, and they ate well for several days.

There was no effective resistance against Voldemort; Dumbledore's death having destroyed the main co-ordinator and leaving no natural successor. The Order of the Phoenix appeared to have disintegrated and they had no real news for weeks at a time. Only occasionally there would be some snippet. Kingsley appeared one evening, looking gaunt and strained. He had been on the run for months but could give them some information.

Potter and his friends had got in to the Ministry not long after Remus had visited (although Kingsley didn't know that and Remus didn't tell him). Kingsley didn't know why they had done it, or what had been achieved; he assumed it to be connected with Dumbledore's task. Although they discussed what that could be, none of them knew for certain.

'I just wish we knew where they were' said Kingsley. 'We could give them some help.'

'I think we can guess where they are' replied Remus, 'but they don't want any help. I tried.'

'If you mean Grimmauld Place, they're not' Kingsley informed him. 'They haven't been there since they went to the Ministry; the Fidelius Charm was broken. Nobody I know of has had contact with them since.'

'You think they're dead? asked Dora.

'Not by the Ministry' he assured her. 'We would have heard that. No, I think they're lying low, somewhere. We'll just have to wait for them to surface.' He left soon afterwards, promising to stay in touch if he heard anything.

Kingsley was as good as his word and came back a few weeks later to tell them that the Weasley twins and a friend of theirs – Lee Jordan whom Remus remembered from his teaching days at Hogwarts – had come up with a crazy scheme to launch an underground radio station. Of course, they were only kids, but at least it was something, some kind of gesture to show that there was still a resistance to You-know-who. Kingsley was in on it, not just to do something, but to offer a bit of protection. Once the Death Eaters got wind of the scheme, anyone involved would be a target.

Remus immediately offered his support as well. Every now and then he would be contacted and given instructions on how to get to the next transmission. Of course, it all had to be done in secret, and they tried never to use the same location twice. Those who were not broadcasting would keep a lookout, and on more than one occasion they had to cut and run as they had been traced.

Remus developed a great deal of respect for the young men who had thought up this madcap idea. They all knew exactly what they were letting themselves in for, but at least they felt they were doing _something. _It was the inactivity that was so hard to bear; they all wanted to fight Voldemort, to try and help Harry, of whom there was still no word.

Christmas eventually arrived, and Andromeda did her best to lighten the gloom for a couple of days. Remus got the decorations down from the loft for her and she helped Dora dress the room. She had to do all the lifting and stretching for her as her belly was now swelling almost by the day. Dora seemed best able to cope with the general mood of gloom, perhaps because of her child. She, at least, had something to look forward to.

Christmas dinner was a rabbit Remus had caught, and Andromeda brought out a bottle of wine as it was a special occasion. Even Dora had a sip, to toast her father and hope that one day he would return to them.

Christmas passed and the long dreary winter continued to hold the land in its grip. As March approached, they all looked forward to some sign of spring; some evidence of new life and new hope, but spring was late that year. The weather remained resolutely cold, grey and miserable. Dora's pregnancy progressed, but as she grew larger she became more and more frustrated at her inability to get outside for more than a few minutes before the weather forced her back indoors.

-o0o-

Remus was normally first up in the morning, and had got in to the habit of making a cup of tea for everyone else. Whilst they were drinking it, he would take a few moments to go outside and check what the weather was doing.

He found Ted outside the front door, where they had dumped him. Three things were immediately obvious to Remus; Ted was dead, he had put up one hell of a fight, and he couldn't let the women see their husband and father like this.

Remus moved Ted out to some bushes and did what he could to clean up the blood and hide the bruises. It wasn't much, but Ted looked slightly less battered at the end of it. Remus was almost surprised by the lack of emotion he felt going about his task. It wasn't that he had no feelings for the man laying dead in front of him; Ted had made Remus as welcome as he could and probably more welcome than he wanted to and Remus had appreciated that. They had even began to form a tentative relationship themselves, Ted often looking over to Remus with a resigned shrug when he was on the sharp end of Dromeda's tongue as if to say 'You've got this all to come!'

No, Remus buried his feeling because Ted was now a corpse, and it was the living he was worried about; particularly Dora. He went back in to the house and fortunately found Dromeda on her own; Dora having gone back upstairs to wash and dress. There was no way he could make this pretty; his mind was still too closed to what he had seen. He would have to tell her straight.

'Andromeda, I've got bad news for you. I've just found Ted in the garden; he's been murdered. I'm sorry.'

Andromeda looked at him with a complete lack of comprehension; then her face drained of colour as his words sunk in.

'No. No, it's not true. You're lying to me. HOW DARE YOU? GET OUT OF MY HOUSE. DO YOU HEAR ME, GET OUT!'

She flew at him with fists raised and he caught her by the wrists, holding her tight until her grief rose to the surface, and then took her in to a hug.

'No, no. Not Ted, not my Ted.' She pulled herself free looking at him with her face contorted by pain, the tears already spilling from her eyes. She was almost pleading with him. 'I want to go to him, please take me to him.'

Remus put his arm around her shoulder and led her in to the garden towards where Ted lay. As soon as she saw the body she broke free and ran to him, throwing herself down and taking him in a hug.

'TED! TED! WAKE UP! SPEAK TO ME!'

Remus knelt beside her and put his arm around her again, holding her and supporting her through her tears. Remus turned as he heard footsteps behind him and saw Dora walking towards them. She had heard her mother's screams and, half knowing what had caused them, came outside. Remus jumped up and ran towards her, wanting to stop her getting any closer.

'What's happened? Let me go, what's happened.'

'Dora, it's your father. Don't please, stay back here with me.'

She fought him off and rushed to her mother's side. The two women fell in to each other's arms and keened their grief together. Remus held back, not wanting to join them, knowing that he was an outsider and that they needed each other more than him at the moment.

Only when the first wave of anguish had passed did Remus approach them, kneeling beside Dora and putting her arm around her.

'Take your mother inside, Dora. Look after her whilst I make the arrangements out here, then I'll come to get you both.' He helped her up, and then they both got Andromeda to her feet.

Dora guided Andromeda inside, keeping her moving whenever she tried to look backwards towards her husband's body, and offering what little consolation she could.

'I'm with you, mum. We're both here; Remus will make the arrangements. Come with me now. I'll look after you.'

Remus walked around the garden, selecting a sport for Ted's grave. For some reason it felt right to bury him here, in his own garden; safer for Ted. Remus found a spot beneath a tree by the hedge and used is wand to dig the hole, then went back in to the house. Andromeda and Dora were sat side by side, their arms around each other and crying pitifully.

'Everything's ready Andromeda' he said quietly 'it's time to go.'

She looked up at him her face etched with grief and looking much older, and nodded imperceptibly. Dora helped her stand and together the three went back in to the garden.

Remus used a hovering charm to help him carry Ted's body to the grave and lower it gently in to place. No words were spoken; nobody could think of anything to say. Andromeda went to get some flowers, which she dropped in with him.

'He always like flowers, he should have some.'

Dora held her mum again as neither of them could bear to watch as the earth was replaced, hiding Ted from all mortal eyes for the last time. As the last of the soil settled in to place Andromeda looked at Remus. 'Thank you for doing this for him. Now, will you both please leave me, for a while?'

Remus took Dora back to the house, sitting her on his lap and letting her tears fall. He didn't try to stop her, or tell her to be brave. He just let her cry. Andromeda stayed by the grave, on her own, until dusk fell, then came in and went straight to her room.


	8. Chapter 8

The house was as quiet as a grave itself after Ted's death; Andromeda had found it incredibly difficult to pull herself round. Ted had been a much larger part of her life than she had ever imagined, and she was racked by guilt that she could have been a better wife to him. She was convinced that she had never made him truly happy and it fell to Dora to try to convince her she was wrong. It was not an easy job for, in truth, Andromeda had been difficult to live with. If she had completely cut herself off from her past, it may have been easier, but she never forgot she was a Black and Dora always thought her mother harboured some faint hope that one day she would be reconciled to her family.

Remus and Dora sat in the living room watching the embers of the fire slowly fade to black. It was after eleven o'clock on the 31st of March. They were alone; Andromeda having gone to bed early as she tended to recently. Dora took hold of his hand.

'It will soon be April, and by this time next month, we'll be parents.'

He smiled at her. 'You'll be a mummy, and I'll be a daddy. I never thought it would happen to me, you know? Having a family.'

'Remus, I'm scared. What are we going to do about the birth? Who's going to help me?'

He put his arm around her, pulling her in to a hug. 'We'll manage; your mother had you, and women have been giving birth for millions of years. You'll be fine.' He hoped he sounded more confident than he felt.

'Will you promise me something?'

'What?' There was something in her voice that made him suddenly wary.

'That, whatever happens, you won't take me to St. Mungo's. No, don't argue. If I turn up there they'll find out about it. I'll end up like dad and I don't want that. Promise me.'

He hugged her tighter to him. Surely nothing could go wrong; she was young and healthy. 'I promise.'

A few days later, Dora began to get very restless, and started prowling round the house. One morning they actually found her in the kitchen, on her hands and knees, scrubbing out the insides of the cupboards with a toothbrush. She also had this overwhelming urge to wash clothes and then iron them; in itself a sign something was very different. When they ran out of laundry, she started washing and ironing clean things. Remus couldn't understand what was happening, but Andromeda took him to one side and explained that Dora was "nesting". It was an indication that her time was near.

Remus asked her about the birth, confiding in his mother-in-law that Dora was worried.

'I think I know what to do' she said. 'If things go wrong, I think there is one person I could trust, who would come and help us out. Has she said anything to you about St. Mungo's? She made me promise we wouldn't take her there.' Remus confirmed he had had the same conversation. 'We'll just have to hope.'

A few days later, Dora went in to labour. For the first few hours they could do nothing but sit with her, keeping her occupied. As things progressed, Andromeda became more important, helping her daughter with advice through the contractions and trying to remember what had happened to her all those years ago. Apart from that, there was little they could do and just had to let nature take its course. The part that Andromeda was most worried about was the umbilical cord, which she knew needed to be tied and cut. She'd read up about it, and the book made it seem quiet easy, but that was in a book.

Dora's contractions started to come faster and faster, and Andromeda was convinced the baby would be born soon. She sent Remus to deal with Dora, whilst she stayed at the business end.

'Push, Dora, I think I can see his head! Next contraction, give me a big push!'

Dora did as she was told, and the actual birth itself was over in a moment; she had been very lucky. Andromeda had some thin string ready and tied off the cord as tightly as she could, and then sending up a silent prayer she made the cut. Dora's child, for better or worse, was an independent being.

They sat with her, drinking a welcome cup of tea whilst she nursed her baby for the first time. In one respect, Remus had been right; birth was a natural event, and most of what followed was down to instinct. The baby was hungry, and his mother could provide everything he needed – for it was a he, they had a son.

Andromeda looked at her daughter and grandson and some of the suffocating depression she had felt since the death of her husband began to lift. The baby lay, snug and warm without a care in the world, safe in his mother's arms. As they looked at him his hair, which had been black when he was born, began to change shade turning through auburn to ginger.

'Just like you, Dora' said Andromeda, smiling. 'Your hair started to change colour the day you were born. Have you decided on a name?'

Dora looked at Remus and smiled. 'I want to call him Ted, after his granddad. Do you mind?'

Remus suddenly found he couldn't speak, and his eyes filled with tears. Within moments, he found himself hugging Andromeda, who had collapsed crying in to his arms. It was the most perfect name ever and finally allowed her to express her grief.

-o0o-

Remus wanted to spread the news of his son's birth; it was important he told _somebody, _but whom? He knew Molly and Arthur Weasley would want to know, but wasn't sure if he would still be able to get in there. He could go and see Bill Weasley though. Bill had given him his address, which would allow him through the fidelius charm. Dora gripped him tightly before he left.

'Be careful won't you, and hurry back? Give them my love.'

Remus stepped out in to the wind and rain of that stormy April night and apparated to Shell Cottage. He had expected only Bill and Fleur to be present, but had been overjoyed to find the others there as well and to see that they were still safe. For some reason, it gave him a sense of great hope.

As soon as he saw Harry he remembered the last time they had met, and how Harry's harsh words had brought him to his senses, and eventually back to Dora. This young man was truly the son of his parents, and he could think of nobody better to act a protector to his son – not that it would ever be needed, of course. He asked Harry to be Godfather, and the boy had been thrilled. As they embraced all enmity was forgotten, and then somebody had put a glass in to his hand. It had been Christmas since he had last had a drink, and the wine went straight to his head, its effects heightened by the warmth and good wishes flowing towards him. The second glass had tasted even better, and it took a great act of self-control to refuse the third. He knew that Dora would be worrying all the time he was away from her.

Remus was only away for a couple of hours and came back with his eyes shining. One sniff of his breath told Dora it wasn't just caused by happiness and she gave him a hard stare, which he completely failed to notice.

'I saw Bill and, even better! you'll never guess who else was there?' She couldn't guess.

'Harry! He's there with Ron, Hermione and a couple of the others. They're all OK! I asked Harry if he'd be godfather, by the way, I hope you don't mind? It seemed right somehow, the next generation and all that.'

Dora didn't mind at all, and thought it was a wonderful idea. She knew how fond of Harry Sirius had become in the few months they had known each other and it seemed right somehow.

The next few weeks passed by as they often do for new parents; both wondering what had hit them. Ted – or Teddy as he was known – was completely oblivious to everything going on in the world. All he knew was that it felt good when he was dry and fed and being held. It didn't matter to him whether it was light or dark when he wasn't those things, and he soon discovered that making the loud noise helped put it right.

Dora spent quite a lot of time just lying in bed, trying to get some sleep when she could and waiting for the next cry to wake her up. Remus proved himself to be a caring and concerned father and found he had no problems dealing with nappy changes and bath time. Little Teddy was so small he could be easily washed in a hand basin and rather liked the feeling of being in warm water. It reminded him of something in his past that was already slipping from memory.

-o0o-

The next full moon was approaching, and they discussed how best to handle it. Remus would go back to the flat, as he always did. There had been no chance to make a secure room in Andromeda's house, so he couldn't stay there.

'We need to know, Dora, and we might as well find out sooner rather than later. As soon as the moon is up, expose him to it and see if he changes.'

'But he's so little, Remus. Won't it hurt him? I don't think I could bear to see him suffer.'

'If he is infected, it's something he'll have to get used to. I know it will be hard for you, but it's going to be with him all his life.' This discussion brought back all the reasons why Remus had never wanted children, and the guilt of what he might have passed on to his darling child gnawed at him.

'What if he does change? What do I do?

'He's so young he won't be a danger to you, but I don't think you'll be able to feed him. He's just got to get on with it. He'll be very hungry when he changes back though. I'll try to get back here as soon as I'm done, just for a few hours. If he is then I can take him back with me, if you want.'

Of course, it was all speculation but Dora became more and more nervous as the final day wore on and clung to Remus before he left. Eventually, he had to prise her hands away; he was already cutting it fine.

Dora sat with her mother in the bedroom with Teddy lying in his cot before the window. The curtains were open and they waited for the moon to swing round. They sat watching the baby, who was sleeping peacefully having been fed shortly beforehand, lost in their own thoughts.

Dora had already strongly bonded with her child and knew, come what may, that she would always look after him. Even if he did change, she would continue to be his mother and care for him; she could never turn him away from her.

Andromeda sat reflecting on the changes she had known in her life. Born to a powerful and noble family, she had given up everything for what she had thought was love. She had spent most of her married life realising it wasn't, and regretting the fact. Only when it was too late had she realised it was more than love she had found, better than love. She had been married to a man who cared about her and for her, and now he was gone. In front of her lay her grandson; the child of the daughter who had always been a slight disappointment and had married a werewolf. As a Black, she could not possibly sink any lower.

'But' she thought 'as a Tonks, I have a daughter who still loves me and a son-in-law who has taken care of both of us, and a grandchild to watch grow. Maybe being a Black isn't so special, after all.'

As the moon swung in to view in the window she reached across to hold her daughter's hand. The baby continued to sleep peacefully, and only woke when it was time to be fed again. He had not been infected by his father. Warm tears of joy ran down Dora's cheeks as she held her son to her breast. It was all going to be OK; she had a family to love.

-o0o-

May dawned and, even if he had wanted to, the most powerful dark wizard ever could not hold back the elemental forces of Nature. The 1st of May, May Day, has a long history and has been considered the traditional start of summer for thousands of years. Even Remus, the ultimate scholar, felt a stirring of something as he stepped out of the house that day to look up at the pale blue sky. He noticed, as if for the first time, the stirring of the Earth and the growth of new shoots over Ted's grave. After breakfast, he went in to the shed and came out carrying a garden fork and spade and began turning over the soil in the vegetable patch. They would need all the help they could get this year as far as food went, and the more they could grow for themselves the better.

He worked on steadily until late evening and got a good portion of the work done. He would finish it off tomorrow and went to bed pleasantly tired as a result of his labours.

The following day the weather remained fine and he continued with his work. Dora came down to join him with the baby once the sun was properly up and the air had warmed. They sat and had their lunch on a rug beneath a tree where there was a little shade. After they had eaten, they lay down with the baby between them and watched Teddy as he stretched and yawned then fell asleep. They lay like that for several hours; a family together on a warm summer day.

That evening, a lynx patronus soared through the window,

'_Potter at Hogwarts. Meet inside Hog's Head. We're going to fight.'_

Remus stood up immediately. 'I have to go, Dora, you stay here and look after Teddy.'

'Remus! No!'

'I want you to stay, Dora. Teddy needs you, and they need me.' He took her in his arms. 'Promise me you'll stay here.'

Andromeda came across to them, taking Dora from him. 'He's right, Dora, let him go. You're a mother now.'

Remus gave her and Teddy a kiss, then left the house. Dora gave Teddy his bath that night, drawing comfort from her son in his innocence and trying to avoid the dull pain where her heart used to be.

An hour later she still hadn't come downstairs so Andromeda went up. She found Dora standing by Teddy's cot, looking down at him sleep, crying. Andromeda crossed the room and put her arm around her daughter, stroking her hair; something she had not done since Dora was a small child.

'I know, Dora, I know. Go to him.'

'Mum, oh mum, I'm so sorry.' She threw her arms around her mother, clinging to her and wailing her grief. 'I love him; I want to be with him.'

'Shh, shh. I understand, of course I do. I've always known you'd want to be with him.'

'But the baby. What about him?'

'I'll look after him for you, I promise.'

Dora picked up her son and kissed him and held him tight to her breast.

'I love you Teddy, I want you to know that, but there's something I have to do. I have to do it for you and all the others. Please forgive me.' The tears ran unnoticed down her face and dripped on to his.

Andromeda took the child from her daughter's unresisting arms fighting to keep her own emotions under control. She had to be strong.

'One more kiss, then say goodbye.'

-o0o-

She stood and held the baby until the twilight faded and night fell before placing him gently back in the cot and pulling up the covers. He slept on, the deep dreamless sleep of pure innocence.

'I'll look after you, Teddy. We will survive this.'

She turned the light off and lay on the bed. She needed to be there when he awoke; she was his mother now.


	9. Chapter 9

Remus apparated in to the bar at the Hog's Head and immediately fell in to Kingsley Shacklebolt.

'Sorry! I got your message, came as quickly as I could. Is he really up at the school?'

''Im and everyone else' came a disgruntled voice from behind the bar as Aberforth wiped a glass, making it dirtier. It looked like the rag he was using hadn't been washed for a decade. 'All bloomin' night I've had people rampaging through here like its King's Cross. Not one of 'em stopped to buy a drink, either.'

'Yes, Remus, it's true' said Kingsley, ignoring the barman. 'Potter is back at the school, but I don't know why. People are turning up all the time; Arthur and Molly have just gone through, along with a couple of former students.'

As he finished speaking, there were more cracks and three young women stood in the bar, looking round. Kingsley immediately drew his wand. 'Identify yourselves.'

'No need to be like that, granddad, we've come to help' said one of the girls, bristling instantly. 'If you want, we'll just clear off and get back to our party. Anyway, Professor Lupin knows us.'

Remus did indeed confirm that these were Katie Bell, Angelina Johnson and Alicia Spinnet; 'Gryffindors and good Quidditch players. It's a pleasure to see you again, ladies. Shall we get up to the school? This, by the way, is Kingsley Shacklebolt, an auror and Member of the Order of the Phoenix.' The girls gave Kinsley an "ooh! get you!" kind of look.

'Right, fine, see you around' grumbled Aberforth, 'call in anytime. I s'pose you want the rest sent up as well do you?'

'You are too kind' replied Remus 'and I assure you we will be more than happy to drink your pub dry – once we've defeated Voldemort.' The group disappeared along the passageway to the school and Aberforth leant on his bar, deep in thought – for him.

'If there's any of 'em left.'

-o0o-

Remus joined the throng of people in the Room of Requirements, Fred (or George) explaining that Harry had gone off to look for something but would be back. Harry did, indeed, return to inform them that the school was going to be defended and they would be able to fight. Remus hung back as the rest left the room, watching Molly struggle with her daughter. Then Percy arrived and Remus felt so awkward watching a family moment he should not have been privy to that he pulled out a picture of Teddy, to show to Harry and Fleur. It had also been he who suggested that Ginny Weasley stay in the castle, rather than go back to an empty house, waiting for…who knew what. Had she of been of age, and able to apparate, he would have suggested sending her to Dora.

In the Great Hall, he watched as the young children began their evacuation and marvelled at the bravery of those who chose to stay behind and fight. He wasn't entirely convinced it was a good idea; although willing they were hardly trained and would be facing Death Eaters. He knew that some of them would not survive the night.

He drew in to a group with Kingsley, Arthur Weasley and some of the teachers as Professor McGonagall addressed the school. Kingsley hastily drew up a battle plan, which they all agreed on.

Remus looked at the group he had been allocated. Pupils from the school, mostly, with a few ex-pupils mixed in.

'Ok, we're going out in to the grounds. Our job is to fight.' His troops grinned or grimaced at each other, according to their natures. 'I'm no good at great impassioned speeches, so I'll keep it simple. We don't know how strong the force Voldemort has brought with him is, but you can be certain that they will not make any allowances for your age.'

He looked at each one of them in turn. 'I want to emphasis this is not a game; you must fight for your lives. Keep your spells simple but make them effective; _Expulso, Confringo, Furnunculus, Impedimenta, _Body-Bind; any of those you know and are confident you can use properly. Now, it may get very confused out there, but try to stay together; get separated and you can be picked off more easily. Understood?' They all nodded, some looking rather pale.

'Finally, I only want volunteers with me. There is still a chance for you to evacuate. No-one will think any the less of you if you change your mind.' He paused as they drew themselves up and gripped their wands tighter and was forced to smile grimly. 'Good luck to you all. Let's go.'

-o0o-

Dora apparated in to the bar of the Hogs Head to find it deserted, apart from Aberforth and Augusta Longbottom who were chatting by the bar.

'Thought I'd be easy enough to reel in, I suppose' said Augusta. 'That Dawlish always has been an idiot. I remember him when my Frank was training; I never thought much of him then. Let's see how he likes spending some time in St. Mungo's.' The vulture on her hat quivered in indignation and Aberforth let out a quick laugh.

''Ello' he said, looking up 'bit late, aren't you?'

'I had to get the baby down first' said Dora, simply. Augusta tried to make a noise that was part congratulatory because of the baby and part disappointed that its father was a werewolf.

'Well, I think most people…In the name of Merlin's pants. What now?'

Aberforth was staring at the portrait hole, unable to believe his eyes. A steady stream of Hogwarts students were starting to appear, the older ones apparating away, the younger ones milling around in confusion. He walked up to one of them, grabbing his arm. 'What's going on?'

'We're evacuating' said the boy. 'McGonagall told us to all get out, without our clothes or owls or anything.'

The first few children tried to leave the pub, immediately setting off the Caterwauling Charm, and they rushed back inside. 'Stay here, the lot of you, and don't you touch nothing' bellowed Aberforth.

He turned to the two women 'I'm going up that school, see what the hell's happening.' With that, he left along the passageway the children had just descended.

Dora decided she had to do something, so reached for the jar of Floo Powder on the mantelpiece.

'Listen, all of you' she called out. The children fell silent. 'Those of you who know how to use the Floo Network, I want you to start getting home now. Help your friends and any younger children, take them with you. Tell your parents what is happening here. Tell them Voldemort is attacking the school, and that Harry Potter is organising the resistance. Start moving.'

As the children started moving towards the fireplace, Dora turned to Augusta. 'I'm going up to the school as well, are you coming with me?' Augusta nodded her head.

'My grandson is there; he will be fighting, of course. I shall go to help him.'

The two women got in to the passageway, and Augusta decided to seal it behind them. There was only one direction to go now. They came out in to the Room of Requirements, finding Ginny Weasley sat miserably in the corner – alone.

'Tonks!' Ginny threw herself at the young woman. 'They've left me all on my own. I'm so glad you're here!'

She gave them as much information as she could, telling Dora that Remus had taken a group of fighters somewhere, but she wasn't sure where. Then, they just had to sit there waiting until somebody came back with more up-to-date information. Dimly, they could hear the sounds of explosions in the castle, some close enough to dislodge dust from the ceiling.

Eventually Harry came back, confirming that Remus was somewhere in the grounds but he needed them all out of the room for a while. Dora started running off, planning to start her search, when a curse flew in to the wall behind her, making Ginny scream.

'Down, Ginny! Stay away from the window!' Dora crawled back to the girl, checking she was unhurt. She took a quick view through the shattered glass. ' There are Death eaters down there! Let's give 'em hell!'

Dora started firing off jinxes and curses for all she was worth, taking grim satisfaction on seeing her opponents fall. Ginny got off a good shot as well, taking out a Death Eater with a cry of '_Impedimenta!' _'Well done, Ginny! We'll show them!' The two grinned at each other and carried on firing.

Aberforth came running past, so Dora called out to him for any news of Remus. 'He was duelling Dolohov, haven't seen him since' came the reply.

Dora forgot Ginny, forgot everything. A ll that mattered was to get to her husband, and she ran off down the dust filled corridor, heading for the grounds, using a small side corridor she knew would take her away from the main entrance. Letting herself out of a door, she made her way carefully round the side of the castle using shadows as much as possible to stay out of sight. This was not a time for recklessness.

-o0o-

Remus was calling out to his 'troops', encouraging them to stay together. It had started very well when they managed to ambush a group of Death eaters in an alleyway, who had all fallen as a mass battery of spells hit them. This had given the children confidence, but once they moved out of cover, things were different. They could now see, but also be seen.

The two sides were now fighting at close quarters, hand to hand dueling. Although the youngsters were less experienced, their speed and agility were used to good advantage, as many of Voldemort's overweight and unfit fighters found to their cost and many of them fell to spells cast by people half their age. Of course, it was not all one-way traffic and Remus began to lose people as well. The spells being used against them tended to be darker, and screams ripped through the night air as they found their mark.

Remus found he was doing less and less fighting, and throwing out more shield charms as he tried to rally his forces and organise a retreat towards more sheltered areas. It seemed to him that "hit-and-run" tactics may be more effective. As he told his people to get back, he heard a roar and a flash of green passed close to is shoulder. He turned to see Dolohov running towards them, the intention to murder as many as possible writ clear on his face.

'Get back to the school' Remus called. 'I'll deal with this one. Run!'

-o0o-

As she moved along the walls, Dora came across two men trying to force a window to gain access to the school buildings. The first died without knowing why; the second had a chance to turn before he, too, was hit by her killing curse. She was fighting for her son; there were no etiquettes or protocols to be followed anymore.

Finally, she could see the grounds and searched desperately for Remus, but she couldn't see him in the confusion. All over the lawn leading down to the lake individuals and groups were fighting in a sprawling mass of humanity, lit by the flashes of spells and the light from explosions. A light mist was spreading from the lake, adding to the confusion as people drifted in and out of sight.

She could not see Remus, but she found a target. Bellatrix Lestrange came in to view and Dora's heart burned with hatred for this woman. She remembered her father; now he could be avenged. As the red mist descended upon Dora, she charged.

-o0o-

Remus dueled long and hard with Dolohov. They spun and turned and slashed in a macabre parody of dance, but with only death on their minds. Both were experienced and able wizards; the fight between them was based only on degrees of success and failure. Spell after spell was dodged or blocked, then returned with interest. Either man could have died at any time. Dolohov was fighting with a wound to his face, Remus was caught in the arm with a stun and only just managed to raise his wand in time to stop the next attack. It was a hard, physical effort and both men were starting to tire. Now, it was a case of who made the first mistake.

From the corner of his eye, Remus saw a student hit and fall; his opponent moving in for the kill. Remus threw out a shield charm and, as the boy scrambled to pick up his wand, Dolohov seized his chance. The _avada kedavra_ hit Remus square in the chest and he knew no more.

-o0o-

Bellatrix was working in tandem with another Death Eater. He would stun their opponent, preferably from behind and Bella would finish the job. In the melee and confusion, it was a good tactic, and was proving effective. However, in concentrating on their hunt for victims, they made themselves vulnerable, as Travers found to his cost.

Whilst lining up a pupil he was hit by a killing curse and slumped forward on to the floor. Bellatrix spun around to see where the attack had come from, and screeched in rage as she saw her hated niece.

'I tried to get…' then she had to throw herself aside to avoid the flash of light heading towards her heart. Dora was in no mood to trade insults; this was a fight to the death.

The two women closed upon each other, screaming their curses in to the night, the light from their wands illuminating the hatred carved in to their faces. The spells were wild and unfocused and many found marks they were not intended for. It didn't matter if they were killing friend or foe with their missed shots; all that mattered was to eventually hit the primary target.

Again, there was no obvious winner in this duel. It would come down to a split second, an error or luck. That night the luck was with Bellatrix.

It may have been a hump in the grass, or a wet patch, but something caused Dora to slip and sprawl to the ground. She had time to turn and raise her arms, but an arm will not deflect a killing curse, and Nymphadora Lupin was thrown back - dead.

-o0o-

They were not heroic deaths, not really. There was no tragic music swelling in the background, and the world did not stop to mourn their passing. Nor was it a great romantic moment.

They never found each other that night; Remus died still thinking his wife was caring for their baby. They did not die in each others arms; there were no last kisses or whispered 'I love you'.

They were just two more bodies sprawled on the ground as the battle ebbed and flowed around them before eventually moving away.

Only later, when the dead were recovered from the battlefield, were they laid next to each other in the Great Hall of Hogwarts Castle. It gave some comfort to the survivors to know they were together.


	10. Epilogue

Harry decided that it was his job to tell Andromeda Tonks what had happened.

Hermione offered to come with him, as did several teachers, but this was something he had to do alone; he owed it to his godson. On his way to the house he rehearsed his speech, but didn't need it. As soon as she opened the door, she knew.

'Both of them?' Harry nodded. 'I'm sorry' was the only inadequate thing he could think to say.

Andromeda turned and walked to the sitting room, leaving the door open. Harry followed her, and found her sat in her armchair, staring blankly ahead.

'What happened?'

'I don't know for certain; I was fighting in another part of the castle. They were both outside fighting, when it happened.'

'Who killed her?'

'I don't …'

'Was it Bella?'

'Yes.'

'And she survived?'

'No. She was killed later in the battle.'

A silence descended on the room. Andromeda had lost more than most to this war; her husband, daughter, son-in-law and sister.

'Were they together, at the end?'

'Yes' Harry lied. It wasn't important, so long as it gave Andromeda some comfort.

He wanted to see Teddy, but didn't know how to raise the subject. Perhaps he should just leave for now and come back another time. The matter was solved for him when crying could be heard from upstairs. Andromeda stirred at the sound.

'Teddy's awake; he needs feeding. Do you want to see him?' Harry nodded and followed her up the stairs.

She picked the baby up and gave him a cuddle, then turned to Harry.

'You're his godfather, aren't you? Do you want to hold him whilst I get his bottle ready?'

'Yes, please. I'd like that. I'd like to be a proper godfather to him, and help you raise him. If I could?'

'You're a good boy, Harry, but you're young. You've got your own life to lead.'

'No, I'd like to do it. A boy should get the chance to know his godfather, if he can.'

Andromeda smiled sadly and nodded, she knew he'd never had much chance to get to know Sirius.

'I think Teddy would like that, he'll need a man around.'

They went back downstairs, Harry carrying his precious bundle who was starting to want his dinner. He watched as Andromeda prepared the bottle; it didn't look difficult, he could do that.

He sat down in a chair, and she showed him how to test that the milk wasn't too hot by dropping some on to his wrist. Then he offered it to Teddy who, sucking lustily, looked up with unblinking eyes at this new face. As the baby fed, his hair began to change, and not just its colour. It became black and spiky, sticking out at all angles.

Harry felt his eyes fill with tears, and held the baby tighter. This child, his godson, would never know his parents. Just like Harry he was an orphan. He would have a loving grandmother to care for him, and Harry, but he would only know his real parents from photographs and the memories of their friends.

But he would also never know war and the fear of Voldemort. Teddy represented the future and they all had a future now, filled with peace and hope.

Harry thought that, when he left here, he should go and talk to Ginny.


End file.
